How to Rekindle an Old Friendship | MV Psych (2024)

Looking through photos and seeing familiar faces of old friends is part of life. People grow and move on to new chapters. As people live and move forward, they can try to stay in touch with old friends while meeting new people. This life event is normal and many people come to accept that reality. If you're looking at photos and missing a friend from high school, consider rekindling the friendship. It's okay to want to reconnect with someone from your past and to be both excited and nervous. Whether it's been a year or a decade, there are tips and resources to help you reach out to an old friend.

The value of friendships

It is important to understand the importance of friendship. Friendships and relationships influence our lives in more ways than we think. Studies suggest that the lack of a social circle and close friendships is onesignificant health risk. It is not good for mental health when people feel lonely. Creating and maintaining meaningful friendships is a crucial part of your life. Friends are a great source of support when you need it most. Whether they make you laugh so hard that your stomach aches, or hug you to make you feel safe, friendships provide people with stable support. Although we form strong bonds with people, sometimes friendships fall apart. In most cases, people move on to different chapters in their lives and friendships wither away. Sometimes friendships don't end as innocently as when people hurt each other's feelings, which makes the end of the friendship more problematic. As people get older, they may realize that life can get in the way of maintaining friendships. People go to college, go to work, get married, have children and the list goes on. It takes a conscious effort to rekindle a lost friendship.

Think about why you want to rekindle the friendship

When people think about the memories they have with their friends, it can usually make them happy or evoke different types of emotions. If you're thinking about rekindling a friendship, consider whether the friendship is worth your feelings and effort. Did you and your boyfriend have a healthy relationship? If you know that the relationship you had with your friend was supportive and healthy, it may be worth continuing. It's also important to recognize when it might be best not to reconnect with a friend. Sometimes you grow through friendships. Think about the circ*mstances in which the friendship ended. If you and the friend have grown apart naturally, they may be more receptive to your efforts. But maybe the friendship ended because of a hurtful argument. Revisiting unhealthy or abusive relationships is not beneficial to you, and if this is the case, it may be best to continue your life with the friendship as a memory. Another factor to keep in mind is the changes in your life since the friendship ended. If you've kept in touch about major life events, there's more of a foundation for you and your friend to build on. People change over time. If a significant amount of time has passed and you and your friend are no longer in touch, it can feel like you're meeting a stranger. Regardless of how much time has separated you and your friend since you last saw each other, if you think the friendship is worth revisiting, there are tips to help you rekindle it blow.

5 Tips to Rekindle a Friendship

Once you've determined that rekindling a friendship is worth it, follow these tips to develop the friendship:

1. Take your time

It may be best to take the time to slowly rebuild your friendship. You can gradually get to know your friend again, reintroduce yourself, and tell them how you're doing since you last connected. You may be excited to reconnect with your friend and want to catch up with him or her about everything going on in your life, but it can be overwhelming at once. This meeting may be the first time they have had contact with you in a long time. Start the conversation lightly and try to understand how they receive your efforts. Think of it this way: you wouldn't ask someone to be your bridesmaid when you first met them. Take the time to get to know your friend again. By slowly rebuilding the friendship, you and your friend can learn more about the people you grew up around.

2. Contact old friends through their preferred medium

A good way to contact your friend is through a social media message or a text message. This initial contact can give you and your friend time to think about what to say and respond. Contacting friends this way can be a pleasant and easy way to reconnect initially. If you and an old friend would rather meet in person or talk on the phone, that's also a meaningful way to reach out. Whatever approach works best for you and your friend is the one you should use.

It's important to be honest with your friend about why you're reaching out. This action shows that your effort is meaningful and not just a random message. If you've been thinking about your friend and you miss him, tell him. It helps your friend to know how you feel about your friendship. Maybe you've seen your friend go through the same major life event as you. After contacting your friend, share your experiences and any stories or advice about the life event with him or her. This can help rekindle your friendship by relating to the same life event and building a conversation about the topic.

4. Tame your expectations

Reaching out to an old friend can be a big step for you, and it can be exciting to see if you both click right away. It's okay to be hopeful, but protect your feelings by tempering your expectations and acknowledging the different outcomes. Your friend may be very receptive to your invitation to reconnect, and may be just as excited about it as you are. But it's also okay if they don't share your enthusiasm about reconnecting. People grow and change as life progresses. If your friend isn't ready to revisit the friendship you had, it doesn't mean your friendship wasn't great. There are a number of different outcomes that can occur when you contact a friend.

5. Prepare for anything

Expecting something to happen is like taming your expectations. Your friend may be ready to meet you right away or want to reconsider the idea of ​​talking again in the future. Friendship is a two-way street, and friends who make an effort to maintain a friendship can help each other grow.

Consider talking to a counselor to improve yourself

Feeling good about yourself can influence your connection with the people around you. Research shows that havingHigh self-esteem can promote positive relationships, and these positive relationships can help boost self-esteem. Talking to a counselor can help you get better. And when you work on yourself, you will see improvements in your relationships. If you want to work with an advisor,contacts doctorstoday at Merrimack Valley Psychological Associates. We work with people to improve the relationships in their lives and we can help with big life decisions that can be overwhelming.

Rated by

Dr. David Rainen, PsyD.

I am a licensed clinical psychologist with an extensive background treating a variety of ages, situations, emotional and mental disorders in individuals and their families. As part of my 10-year professional and educational career in psychology, I have developed and refined my skills and approaches through my work in a variety of settings including: hospitals, outpatient clinics, residential counseling centres, secure and non-secure inpatient/residential settings. treatment programs and therapeutic day schools.